As I look forward to surgery

I continue to use my oils and supplements because there are still two tumors in my body that can begin to grow again before they remove them with a lumpectomy.

Lumpectomy means they will take out just the tumor and a large area around it in the hopes of removing all tissue that contains cancer cells.  I have chosen this vs. a mastectomy because mastectomy, where they remove ALL breast tissue, has the same rate of recurrence that the lumpectomy does.  So I figured why do a more evasive surgery with higher risk of infection when I don’t need to?

Of course because the triple negative tumor (or non hormone responsive) was 7cm when we began there may be a large amount of tissue taken out with the tumor.  This will make the breast look very deformed.  You see from what I understand, breast cancer can either be hormone responsive – hormones cause it to grow – being Estrogen, Progesterone or a protein Her2 – human epidermal growth factor receptor 2   

Or it can be negative and unresponsive to all of these three and then is called TRIPLE NEGATIVE Breast Cancer.  This type is more aggressive but does respond to many chemotherapy drugs.

The hormone responsive cancer, which one of mine is Estrogen positive, Progesterone positive and her2 negative does not respond well to chemotherapy and is usually treated with hormone blockers for decades depending on the woman’s age.

Luckily my E/P+ did shrink a little during my chemo treatments (maybe it was the oils?)  And I will find out Monday after my MRI just how much the triple negative one has shrunk.  From ultrasound it shows considerable shrinkage (makes me think of George on Seinfeld bahahaha) but they need MRI to tell just by how much.

The surgeon can then decide when to schedule surgery and estimate how long it may take.

When I did a PET scan (radioactive sugar) back in April there was no lymph node involvement showing up.  Surgeon finds this hard to believe as most women do have at least 1 or 2 that show positive so she is assuming that she will find some when she goes in for surgery.  I believe the supplements have helped it not to spread but what do I know?  Anyway they will inject a blue dye into the lymph and if any are showing signs of cancer they will turn blue.  She will only remove these.  My hope is not a lot of them as then it effects lymph drainage from your arm on that side for the rest of your life.  As in no blood pressure cuffing, no blood drawings and lymphodemia  may occur – fluid build up in the arm requiring a pressure sleeve to be worn.  Yuck.

I have started to be more aggressive with ingesting oils especially frank in hopes to stop any more growth while I await surgery.  I put 3 drops each of Frankincense, Turmeric, & Copaiba oils in a veggie cap and ingest 5 times a day.  All of these oils have shown to stop cancer growth or slow it in studies.  And it can’t hurt so I am going for it.  I still apply Frankincense topically on the areas morning and evening.  I add 34 drops to a 10ml roller of carrier oil.  This is an oil high in anti-inflammatory properties which cancer or any type of disease is caused by inflammation.

I will share more next week after I get MRI results and I see my oncologist on Monday to do a blood test to check  blood counts and liver/kidney function as I cannot schedule surgery until those are all at normal levels yet I am not worried because those levels have been fabulous the entire treatment.  Only once did my blood counts lower a little.  This was normal due to the chemo but it was not so bad they had to discontinue treatments.  So I am pretty confident that the numbers will be good and I will be on the phone with my surgeon by the end of the day.

After the surgery is complete and pathology gives us the all clear (which means that surgeon took out enough tissue to test negative for any cancer) then I will see a plastic surgeon to basically push remaining tissue together like a snowball to form it into what hopefully will look like breasts and then sew it back up and send me home to heal.  I will be a smaller size obviously but that I am not worried about.  Hopefully I will have all the feeling left in the area and it will look somewhat like normal.  And hopefully I can do all of this with little complications.

I’ll continue to share my oily regime with you all as time goes on.

If you have questions please ask.  I want to try and shed light on this journey so others understand just how things are.  There are many things I didn’t know and assumed many wrong things along the way when I had friends go through this.

For some mastectomy is not a big deal and they are ok with it.  For other’s like myself, this is devastating and not something that you just “get over”.  Because you know what?  Breast cancer looks a certain way under a microscope and even if you have no breast tissue they can still find this exact cancer in your lungs, your liver, your bones or even your brain.  No it’s not brain cancer it is breast cancer in your brain tissues.  There is no easy or obvious answer and you can say that you would do this or that if you were diagnosed but you know what??  You have no idea what to say or how you will feel when they say those words to you.  Suddenly you will second guess every thing you have ever done or are doing and what you will do in the future.  Even tho it seems like I have breezed through this it has been NO CAKE WALK.  I try to stay positive by not dwelling on the negative and kept most of my side effects to myself and my husband.  I didn’t want pity but I also didn’t want that to be my focus all the time either as it will only make you feel worse.  Women deserve better than the way prevention, diagnosis and treatment are currently.  When I think of what my mother went through I just shed tears of the torture that she must have suffered through.  And for many women it is still torture and ugliness no matter how pretty they try and make it with pink ribbons and little bells to ring.  Maybe this is why I have been handed this in my lifes journey, I don’t know but I do know more women need to share their stories and more people need to realize that breast cancer is just as serious as colon cancer or brain cancer.  It is just as much a battle and it takes so much from you.  Even if you try not to let it, it robs you of so much and it’s hard not to feel hopeless and helpless sometimes.  I am so thankful I found Jesus so many years ago and have deep faith as I don’t know where I would be without him.  He has saved me from total devastation through all of this.  And all the prayers you all have sent for me – which remind me – a dear friend in my doterra group went to a recent benefit to raise funds for breast cancer.  Each woman/girl got a pretty pink length of hair to put in their own hair for awareness and then they took a picture holding a plaque stating who thy were supporting and she put ME on her plaque!  My heart was so overflowing with emotions when she showed me that picture.  To know people are doing these things with me in mind makes me so thankful for all of you.  Help me change the world of breast cancer for the better.  1 in 8 women is a disgusting statistic that needs to be changed.  We all deserve better and that includes the husbands, fathers, sons, uncles and brothers out there.

Well I’ve gone on long enough.  See you next week!




My Journey – with my supplements

Hey there!  This will be one of many posts.

I was asked to do a speaking engagement at a doterra product training last week and go over my cancer journey with my doterra products and many people enjoyed learning how to help their families and loved ones with cancer journey’s of their own.

I enjoyed it so much and was asked if I would share more in depth what I used over the last 7 months and continue to use now.  So here is the beginning.

My plan was to do this earlier this week but Chemo decided to rear it’s ugly head on Monday and not cooperate with me very well.  I had what I call a chemo hangover for 4 days and had such a headache i could barley function as well as being really sick to my stomach.  Now that I am finally feeling better with the hope I will continue to improve because I should not need anymore chemo from now on.  I just have to continue to flush it out of my system.  I could not see any clients this week so paying rent the next few weeks will be rather difficult as I have other bills to pay too.  Tim has been very supportive and we are struggling to make ends meet right now.  But I just keep praying and HE just keeps helping us little by little to get us by.  My fear is going to be a huge co-payment we will owe at the end of all this.  I see the surgeon next monday to see what type of surgery is recommended and to see which one I can live with.  It will most likely take place in November sometime and I may end up having to take off a month or more depending on the surgery I have.  Not sure how that will go but it is what it is.

I had a terrific visit on my last chemo with my friend of over 24 years.  She took the day off work so she could spend the whole time with me.  It meant so much to me.  Her heart is so big and I hope I can be more like her as my future goes along.  The nurses nearly made me cry by signing a certificate for me and clapping when I rang the bell.  They do so much more than just administer drugs and help you with cold capping.

Do you know that it was 2 days before Charley’s graduation party and I realized during chemo I had forgotten to order a cake.  I began to cry and I was so mad at this whole cancer crap for robbing me of my memory even more.  This was something I should have remembered!  How could I forget???  I told the nurse when she saw me crying that it was probably to late to get a cake now and she asked me where I would go for the cake so I told her and she said maybe we can call and see if they can do the order over the phone.  She then took her time and actually called the store and when she returned she said “it’s all ok, they put you down as ordering a cake for saturday and all you need to do is call them or stop in and tell them what color and size you want and they said you can email them a picture if you like for it.”  She didn’t have to do that but she did.  She cared that much.  I cried harder because I was just so thankful.  So if you know the chemo nurses please tell them how important they are.  They go way above and beyond.  I will never forget that.  And yes we got the cake and it looked terrific and tasted awesome!

And my husband, oh where do I start…..

He goes out of his way to let me have my time for rest and makes me meals when I don’t feel like making any food and when most of it just nausiates me anyway.  He even ran to hardees for me on the last chemo day because the food they had from the deli just smelled awful to me.  He doesn’t treat me like I am some kind of burden even though I feel like one often just because that is how I am. I never wanted to have people take care of me but I am now learning how to do that.  I guess it is a lesson I need to learn.

Here is the first oil blend I used after this whole thing started back in April when they had me put a port in.  This is done because chemo is very hard on the veins and can actually collapse them and it can be very painful to put any liquid in them after awhile.  So this is a small triangle mesh and silicone device that you put the iv needle into and it has a small tube that runs to a main blood vessel in my neck.  This works handy for any iv not just the chemo.  Below is a picture of what it looks like in a cup (this was someone else’s that was removed) My hope is that mine will be removed in the net month or so. It is not painful but is just uncomfortable and pulls on muscle tissue.  Creeps me out.

The next picture is a collage of the day I had the port put in surgically and the next one is a pic of 6 days later after I had put the Immortelle blend of oils on the site 3-4 times per day.  This blend can help to reduce scarring and wrinkles as well as help to repair skin.  The last picture is what it looks like today – you can barely see the two entry points. It’s a bit red from a bandaid from the fluids I had Wednesday.   I applied this right on the incisions and it didn’t’ hurt at all when I did so.  No burning or stinging either.  It does come in a roller so if you do use this then you may not want to be sharing it with others or using it on your face.  Just purchase another one to do that.  Yes the oils are hard to source so the blend is a bit more pricey but is affordable for how much is in the 10ml roller.  The roller will last 6-8 weeks applying this way.  So it is well worth it.  When you see the results you will understand just how valuable this blend is.

Keep an eye out for more updates on some products you just may enjoy or be able to pass it along to someone who needs it too!


 Day 1 & Day 6




You asked for it so here it comes….

Recently I shared my journey at an event where I spoke about supplements I have used to support me during this time.

Many of these I had begun a few years before I was diagnosed with Triple Negative Breast Cancer and Hormone Positive Breast Cancer on March 23rd, 2018.

I have added more in to my daily/weekly/monthly regiment to further support me during my Chemotherapy Treatments.

There is much “old school” or inaccurate and out dated information when it comes to treating cancer and some of the medical community is still stuck in this area when it comes to whole body wellness when going through any medial issues.

I am here to share with you what I have done naturally to support my whole body and how my basic tests for Liver and kidney function have stayed healthy during the entire treatment even while taking the supplements.  As well as my the tumor they were most concerned about has been shrinking and the doctors are very happy with my progress.

I will be highlighting the supplements here over the next few posts so you can get an idea of how you or someone you care about can have better health during cancer.  My goal is also to begin sharing this with the local medical community.

Stay tuned for more info coming!


So much has happened!

Wow! I am so sorry I have not been writing so much lately.

Here is a bit of what has happened.

I was scheduled for my 3rd dose dense chemo treatment (15th total) on the Thursday before the doterra convention which was September 13th.  However, the week before i ended up in the hospital with extreme abdominal pain.  Actually felt like labor – but I know that is not happening!  I believe it was a kidney stone but they found no such thing when they did a scan.  So they wrote it off as a side effect of the chemo.  I was not happy when they could not give me a reason for why this all happened and was very worried it would happen while I was out of state at the convention.  I did not want to miss convention as I had achieved a new level with doterra and was going to be recognized during the convention twice.  I was very excited and very worried at the same time.

I managed to convince my dr to postpone my treatment until I came back from convention.  So we drove back and arrived home Sunday September 23rd.  The next morning I went in for my 3rd dose dense (#15) and I slept during the entire visit.  Woke up just long enough to give them my name rank and serial number before injection, ok, I’m kidding but you do have to give them your name and birthdate in order for them to give you the meds.

My best bud came and sat with me the whole time and even took off work to be there.  I was so happy.  Of course she was rather bored because all she did was watch me sleep. lol.  Tim had to work and could not change his schedule so I really appreciated her being there.

I had to shift my work schedule around a bit as I wasn’t feeling to great the next 2 days so I slept alot.

I have also begun to shed alot after my 2nd dose dense as was expected.  I am hoping it will not be too much more after I am done with my final chemo on October 8th.  Yes #16 will be done then.  Not excited about it as you can expect but it is what it is.  Send positive vibes that my hair will hang in there.  I won’t stop shedding until about 2-3 weeks after the 8th.  And I have to continue to baby my hair with cool water washes and only 2x a week of shampooing very gently.  Still debating if I will bite the big one and just let my hair go grey or if I will color it again later.

I see the surgeon on October 18th to discuss what type of surgery I will be having.  It could be lumpectomy or it could be mastectomy.  Not sure and it will depend on how the chemo did as far as shrinking the tumor.  Plus I still have the hormone positive tumor to deal with too.  Yes I have 2.  One is triple negative or non-hormone responsive and more aggressive and the other is estrogen and progesterone positive.  Have you seen the commercials for the drugs for hormone positive cancer?  Those may be the drugs I will be faced with for years to come.  ugh.

On a brighter note I will be speaking about my cancer journey and sharing with a large group tomorrow evening how I have used doterra oils and products during it to help support my health.  It has been a great journey.  I am also giving away some of those oils to everyone who opens a wholesale account with doterra this month.  You can use the oils yourself or you can share it with someone you care about and help their journey.  I am so excited to share tomorrow!

And I get to share at the 8th annual Pink Event in New London on October 23rd.  It will be at the AmericINN and many survivors will be speaking about their journey’s and giving insight and help to others who are enduring the journey.    Lots of prizes and items to win as well as free gifts.  Can’t wait to share.

A local photographer offered a free glam session for me to celebrate the end of my chemo journey too!  I am so excited and can’t wait for the session later this month.  It’s been awhile since I have had pictures taken and I am hoping it will make me feel better after all this junk I’ve been through.

I had a terrific time in Utah during the convention and met some great people.  I loved the recognition and walking across a stage in front of over 30,000 people.  All cheering me on even if they didn’t know me.  doterra donated 5 million to women’s cancer research.  On top of that they announced the plans to build 5 more of the already 2 existing natural healing clinics.  These will be build outside of Utah and I can’t wait to see where they will go.  The doctors will be trained in using essential oils for medicinal purposes for their patients and will offer other natural treatments such as chiropractic care, massage therapy, acupuncture, energy healing, reflexology and more!  All while combining these with western medicine to help the patient support the whole body and find the root cause to their health issues.  I have hoped and prayed for this type of healing clinic for years and am so glad I get to experience it becoming main stream.

But for some reason – I am sure it is the HOLY SPIRIT – I am feeling ok with all of this.  I am not worried as much and I feel at ease during all of this.  I am not terrified of the future – at least not very often.  lol.  I use more oils now for grounding and relaxation as well as doing more energy work on myself.  The Lord knows what I need and I just need to keep my eyes and ears open to be sure I am doing what I need.

Thank you again for all the positive thoughts and prayers.  I do feel them ALL the time!


What a week!!

Ok so had my 2nd AC Treatment on Aug 30th.  Was not expecting what I got!  Came home Thursday after a rough 2 days of emotions -just feeling down and sad.  Went to bed at 10 pm and didn’t wake up til the next day (friday) at noon!  And still felt tired.  Thank heavens Tim was here to make me some meals as I didn’t even feel like cooking or even making a sandwich!  Ugh!  I got up for a couple of hours, ate and then went back to bed.  Slept for another 6 hours and then up for an hour and back to bed again for the night.  From Thurs. night til Monday morning I think I was awake maybe 8 hours!  I had no energy at all.  It was hard to even breathe and and eat.  I’ve had a lot of mashed potatoes lol as my stomach is not happy at all with the chemo drugs this time.  Even with all the meds they gave me I was still pretty nauseous.

Fun fact it can take up to 7 days after your treatment to wipe out most or all of your white blood cell count.  Leaving you with no immunity what so ever.  So please if you are sick stay away from anyone who is going through chemo.  If one runs a fever of over 100 then it may require a trip to the ER as an infection could run rampant.  I had a fever Saturday of 99.1 but it went down by morning and I took some onguard soft gels just in case I was exposed to anything.  They help to kill off bacteria and viruses.

I finally replenished my coffee this morning so here is a happy pic – and yes I STILL HAVE HAIR – I just put it up in a pony tail cause it was all over the place this morning.   But I have COFFEE!!!

Anyway I feel a bit more normal today and could even drive to the store for my coffee.  I am hoping that the next treatment will be the same or better as I will be leaving for Utah the Tuesday after!  My fellow drivers will need me to drive and be awake for the trip so think positive thoughts.

I have 2 more treatments to go.  Then they tell me I will see the surgeon and must wait til at least 4 weeks for all of my numbers to recover so no surgery until at least November.  Then I may need radiation afterward.  Had no idea this would be like a year long venture when I signed up.

Here I am looking like a dork again lol

Image may contain: 1 person, smiling

2 more pics like this.  They say hair starts to really shed after the 2 weeks mark with AC chemo.  Well today is day 18 and so far just a few strands have made the leap.  So I am praying the shed will not happen.  I don’t think I would look to attractive being bald or with peach fuzz.  At least I don’t have to deal with coloring my hair for the last 4 months lol.

BTW this chair I am in?  It has vibrators and a heater in it!  Real nice when your head is down to 35 degrees.  And it reclines so you can be somewhat comfy.  I have to be my own entertainment tho as no music or tv.  Hard to put ear plugs in and the liquid benedryl makes me sleep for most of the time there.  So my husband and SIL have a chat while they are there for me.  It’s nice cause when I wake up I am never alone and they ask me if I need a warm blanket or a drink.  I’m just not much company – although they probably like the quiet.  lol.

The fair went well and I met some new people and met up with some old friends.  Sadly I met 4 people who had or have had cancer too.  Sigh.  But I had some great visits with many people and I love that part of having a fair booth.  Which reminds me I need to check emails and do my reply’s.

I hope to get a message out next week.  Sometimes the good days get away on me too.  More fluids tomorrow and Thursday too.  Hopefully it will help me keep my immunity strong too.

Talk soon.



The Incredible Shrinking Tumor….

Had an ultrasound this last week to check my progress.  I will have a total of 16 chemo treatments.   (I am on number 14 next week)

The first ultrasound was at #6 and this last one was at #12.

The ultrasound on Tuesday, June 26th showed a tumor size of 16 x 11 x 20 mm.

The ultrasound on Tuesday, August 14th showed a tumor size of 14 x 8 x 20mm

Not a huge amount of shrinkage in 7 weeks but I will take it!  I don’t think the dr is looking for total disappearance of the tumor by the end of September but it should be much smaller.  Considering it started out 5 cm longer to begin with.

The first AC was a bit nerve wracking but there were no huge issues.  I felt very drained for 3 days after it though.  Had to get a driver for my fluid appointment (ha ha like I’m getting my windshield wiper fluid checked) and for my oils class we had.  So glad I didn’t have to miss either of these due to two great friends who offered to drive!

The neulesta shot hurt really bad!  Other ladies tell me to have them inject it slower and it won’t hurt as much.  So far the bone pain is very slight so hopefully it will not get any worse than this, as they tell me I have to have a shot after each of the next 3 chemo treatments.  Ugh!

I see the doctor thursday the 23rd to check my blood numbers and hope for the best.  Soon I will be meeting with the surgeon again to discuss options after we get a final MRI of chemo results.

I am nervous about the Utah trip for doterra convention.  I got my ticket months ago and plan it every year but this has thrown a wrench into my plans.  I will be leaving between the 15th and 16th treatments.  So not sure how I will be feeling and hoping for a smooth drive to Utah.  The nausea has been a bit worse with these drugs vs the taxol combo but am able to control it with meds, acupressure (yes I got to see the theda care natural doc) and eating small meals every few hours.  So far no vomiting which is a plus!  I have had some muscle type issues with my colon and not sure what is causing it but for you ladies who have had a baby, do you remember the pressure you felt in that area when you were giving birth?  yeah, that kinda describes it pretty well except there is no definite end to the pain.  Had to take some pain killers to get to sleep with it.  Hoping it will not come back again as this was the second time.

But back to the natural doc.  It was soooooo nice to be informed that I am doing a lot of the things she recommends already!  Even though I didn’t’ need them she gave me some reflexology points to help with nausea, hot flashes and neuropathy.  Imagine that huh?  Also she recommended the ginger oil and other supplements I am using too.  Made me feel good to have a doctor who knew what I was talking about and was recommending it all too!

My chiropractor is helping with the hip and leg pain I have had and it is tolerable now.  Just not going for jogs or long walks any time soon.

Fair should be fun.  If it’s not fun in the booth I can always go home so if I miss you there just fill out a “sorry I missed you” slip and put it into the cute box Charley made for us and I will get back to you after the fair.  I will not be there tomorrow as we take Charley to school for move in.  Summer went so fast and now off she goes to dorm life.  I am nervous but hope all will go well for her.  Still trying to remember everything we need and probably will forget something important.  Too bad she can’t take Fawn with her.  But no animals allowed.  Darn.

If you see me don’t be alarmed as I “look” tired.  And I am tired.  If you want you can offer me a place to take a nap lol.  But I don’t think I will look rested for the next two months of this as it’s hard to sleep with hot flashes and bone pain so if it’s 3pm and you can’t reach me then you can probably expect that I am napping.  And it may not be planned.  lol.

On a sad note our beloved barn kitty, Cupcakes or “Cakes” as he was lovingly called got very ill and passed away this week.  It was so hard to see him sick and we tried everything we could to help him but it just didn’t work.  He had the prettiest blue eyes and was the last of our Siamese kitty line.  I will miss him but I know he is in a happier place.  I was a crying mess just like a kid losing a pet and even tear up now thinking about it.  Don’t worry though Garfield is still visiting our deck and is trying hard to take Cakes place by rolling on his back and looking all cute and cuddly.

But it just shows us again how life is short sometimes and we shouldn’t take it for granted as it can end quickly before we want it too.  I am not in control nor is any other person here on earth.  So I try hard to tell myself not to worry about the future because I am not in control of it.  God has my plan and it will happen whether I want to follow it or not.  Whether I like it or not.  But that’s why he brought me a couple of really good counselors to help me get through all this.  🙂

Have a great day and I will let you know what the numbers are on thursday sometime this next week.  Sometimes I get behind a bit.  Can’t imagine why.

#13 coming up….

Very nervous this last week because the dose dense stuff starts tomorrow.  Heavy duty strength so that’s why they do them every other week.  2 different drugs so I have no idea how I will react to them.  Just another reminder that God is in control.

Last week was a very emotional and ugly week for me.  I was very sad and very angry all at once.  But a good friend invited me to tool around on a pontoon Sunday and man was that just what I needed.  It was so relaxing and part of the day Adam was at respite so we didn’t have to worry about him.  Then Tim took me out for awhile and we talked for like 5 hours.  So needed that!

Part of the reason I felt so sad was that I worked so hard last year to lose 50 pounds and due to the steroids and all this cancer crap I have gained 20 lbs in twelve weeks!!!    On top of that most women have a hard time getting rid of this after treatments are over!  ugh!  I feel so bloated and just huge.  So I am trying to stay below 25 carbs a day…..this is really really hard to do!  Wow.  Have to watch every label and look up every veggie for the carb info.  But it takes my mind off of the chemo so I guess thats a plus.

So my face is a bit more chubby but look at all that grey hair growing in!  Yes the cold capping is working along with the supplements and the essential oils.  I think i have about a 1-1/2″ growth going on now.  Of course I have no idea how hair will react with new drugs.  Hopefully I will not lose any hair as a result.   I just can’t wait until October when I can wash my hair more than 2x a week and actually use warm/hot water when I do!  This cold water stuff is for the birds!

I feel fairly good but have my bad moments but the side effects have not been as bad as others have had it.  Last week after the 12th taxol I had a lot of leg and hip pain.  Common side effect called neuropathy but it is not constant so that is a good thing.  Trying not to rely on ibuprofen to help with it as I want to keep my liver as healthy as possible during all the other junk they are throwing at me.

Another part of the sadness is that my business in Hortonville is only 2 years old and my time with doterra is at 6 years now and both were just starting to take off more then all of this happened.   I am down to working only 2 days a week on both and it is so hard for me to do.  Many clients are not available for just a tues or wed but I have until oct to finish the chemo and then depending on surgery will depend on how long I will be out of order for that.  I so want to put more time into both but my body is just not cooperating with me and it makes me feel like I have failed in many ways.  I know it’s just Satan whispering in my ear but it can get overwhelming sometimes.

Tomorrow the dose dense protocol has the tendency to wipe out your white blood cells and lower all blood counts so they automatically want to give you nuelesta injection after.  This drug pushes your bone marrow to produce more blood cells and that in turn can cause excruciating bone pain.  I am hoping to talk my dr out of it and waiting to see how the first treatment goes.  FUN FACT – this drug costs about $10,000 for each injection.  There are 4 doses of chemo left so do the math.  Thankfully my insurance will cover this but I just don’t want to do it because of the possible side effects.

Again, thank you all for the prayers and positive vibes.  It is keeping me from a deep depression through this and helping me to stay positive.  Also…….I went in for another ultrasound for the left tumor (it is more aggressive than the right one so they are watching it closer) and they will compare it to the one I had in June.  But the technician was having a hard time finding the tumor and was constantly referring to the last scan to be sure she had the right area.  They do mark it with a small titanium clip when they biopsy it so they can have a marker for surgery but because it has shrunk so much it was hard for her to get a definite area.  I was really hoping she wouldn’t find anything but I will take this.  The radiologist who looked the images over told her “I don’t need to look again, it’s doing what it is supposed to do”.  So I take that as it is shrinking.   I should have some exact measurements when I go in tomorrow to compare to June so I can’t wait for that.

Right now I am in my office diffusing the Anchor Yoga blend and it is heavenly.  Helping to ground me so my thoughts don’t drive me crazy before treatment tomorrow.

We are slowly figuring out how to help Adam best and met with his home team and now will need to schedule an IEP within the next few weeks in order to help him best at school.  I can’t believe school starts in 20 days!  And in 35 days two of my friends (and business partners) and I leave for Utah for the Global Convention.  I can’t wait and pray I am feeling well enough to travel well.  It only takes 22 hours to drive there lol.  So look for Dash on my facebook page as he will be traveling with us.  Al may come along too.  I have to see how much room I have.  There is some kind of secret and fabulous guest speaker on Saturday afternoon that week and they won’t tell us who it is til that day. Also some new products and oils will be released too.   I can’t wait!   So watch my Dreams of Jeanne Facebook page and the SpOILer Group if you are a wholesale member for updates and pictures of mountains and Dash’s adventures from Sept. 18-23.

Also I will be at the Waupaca County Fair next week (as much as my body allows) from 22-26th but I will not be there the 22nd as that is move in day for Charley at MKE Art Institute and I will not be there on Sunday the 26th until it is time to pack up and go.  So if you see that I am at the fair the other days stop in the new commercial building and say Hi.  I would love to see how many of my friends stop in – I’ll be counting.  lol

Talk soon!




Still learning….

Well this week has not been so bad.  Made it through Saturday for the party.  Was really tired by the end of the day but I made it.  I have been having some digestive woes and the dr told me this could happen and can be normal but because it has gone on for a week now they want to test me for Cdifficile or Cdiff which is a bacterial infection.

Not a very nice one either.  It can be very hard to get rid of.  They didn’t tell me that chemo kills off a large portion of your good gut bacteria – good thing I’ve been using some probiotics this whole time as they never recommended it to me.  Hadn’t even thought that the chemo can kill off this too.  I will find out after tomorrow if this is the case.  I pray it isn’t cause I just can’t deal with one more thing with this.  Getting sick and tired of being sick and tired from all this.

I also found out that even if they remove ALL of your breast tissue that doesn’t mean you will never get breast cancer again.  Apparently the breast cancer can move to other places of the body and begin to grow there.  Likely the lungs, liver, bones and brain.  Nice to know huh?  So for everyone who thinks they are safe from it after a mastectomy you really are not.  This is one of the reasons why I may just insist on lumpectomy and not the very invasive mastectomy surgery.

Did fluids twice this week as it seems to help with the exhaustion I feel and they decreased the steroids (which help with nausea) so I am not so hungry ALL the time but now I have more nausea at home so the fluids seem to help with that too so I don’t have to take so many pills for it at home.  I feel like a walking pharmacy sometimes.

On the plus side tho I think I have about an inch of new hair growth (in grey of course) on my head.  I am very thankful that the cold capping is working. It is hard only being able to wash my hair twice a week with shampoo.  And I can only use very luke warm water.  Brrrrr in the shower but it’s easier than trying to do it in the sink.  I am having better results than most women have with the cold capping so I feel so blessed for that.  But the dose dense drugs are coming on august 16th bi-weekly so I am not sure how the hair will react to that.  These are two different drugs than what I have been given the first 12 weeks. I believe one they refer to as the “red devil” as it is colored red.  I wonder if it’s the bags I see others have that are covered in a protective opaque bag? There are so many other people getting treatment when I am there and many have different regiments depending on their diagnosis.  Sometimes there are up to 20 other people having chemo at the same time.  We will see.  I just hope for the best.  Please keep in mind one of these two drugs has a small percentage of a chance to cause cancer of the blood or leukemia and to damage heart muscle.  This is what worries me the most but I don’t have much of a choice right now.

I will have another ultrasound of the left tumor on the 14th to compare to the others to see how much it is shrinking.  Looking forward to that.

It is nice however to not have to worry about stray hairs on my face or having to shave at all so that all saves me time lol.  Still have some eyebrows and lashes so yippee.  Yet I keep having dreams they are all gone and that I have a mullet hair cut and the hair behind my ears is falling out.  I guess my sub conscience is really worried about this. lol  Not sure where the mullet part came from but it didn’t look good in my dream.  I do miss the nose hairs tho cause my nose just decides to run whenever it feels like it with no warning.  So I get to carry around extra kleenex with me wherever I go.  I imagine I am so stuffy all the time because there is nothing to filter out dust and other pollutants from going right to my sinuses now.  And my house is a dust bunny heaven!

I am still able to work Tuesday and Wednesdays so that I am thankful for.  Gotta pay the rent and not have people forget who I am!  Still running the sale until end of august but I may only be doing 2 days a week throughout september depending on how the new chemo is going this month.  Plus I will hopefully be driving out to Utah for Doterra’s global convention on sept 18th. (7 weeks from now!)  So I will be closed that week.  Wish me luck that I am well enough to make the trip.  It will really take my mind off of all this other negative stuff for sure.

I will be at the waupaca county fair in a booth here and there from aug 23-25th.  Luckily I have two other great ladies who are doing wed and sunday so stop by and see us.  We have some specials going on with doterra and we will be in the NEW building.  We move Charley in to the dorm on the 22nd already so I will hopefully be in milwaukee that day to help her.  This summer just flew.  Not sure I am ready for this yet.

I have not been the easiest person to live with this week.  Very irritable, upset, mad, sad, happy, angry – every emotion all within 10 minutes time sometimes.  Please pray for my family who are putting up with me.  Sometimes I just feel like my life has been put on hold and I have not control over anything at all!  Drives me nuts.  I have always been independent so I am trying to tell myself it’s ok to ask for help and receive help.  That’s not going so well.

Again, thanks for all the prayers and positive thoughts.  Without them I know I would feel so down and depressed every minute.  I appreciate those who have helped me out -especially during Charley’s party last weekend.  It was wonderful.

#12 and final of these first two drugs is on Thursday.  those 12 weeks seem to have gone so fast and yet so slow.  lol.  Wish me luck!


Another Fun Cancer Fact….

Well not so fun but I wonder how many people know that some of the drugs used to fight breast cancer can also CAUSE leukemia or blood cancer or other cancers.  I was amazed at how some women who are currently on this journey had no idea that the drug they are using for chemo can actually cause cancer in another part of the body.

This week I read through the sheets they gave me when I began this whole thing, I read that part of it and how it says “talk to your dr. about this”.  Well duh.  I did but they really don’t give you another option and as I read this “may cause leukemia or blood cancer”  I began to cry.  I don’t cry that often in this journey now as I have accepted most of it but this, this just made me cry out of anger.  How can this be the ONLY option given to people?  How can this be acceptable?

Then I see a post in one of my cancer groups on fb that a recent Yale study shows that those who use alternative cancer treatments die sooner than those that use conventional.  So basically poo-pooing alternative treatments.  This angered me even more.  For one, the poster had no idea who paid for the Study- a big issue for me.  But in a world where the only “treatment” or “cure” the oncology dept can give me is a possible damage to my organs and veins as well as possible cancer caused by the drugs why wouldn’t a person try and look for a more natural way to “treat” this??  Sadly modern medicine can’t even get on the same page with treatments.  They go by a study of a few thousand women who are all different, and just because 85-90% of them had a good outcome then that is the treatment plan for every single woman who comes in with this same cancer issue.  That’s fine if you are not the 10-15% that the treatment doesn’t work for isn’t it?  That’s fine if you are NOT one of the 1% who ends up with another cancer or permanent organ damage – including brain damage – from the treatment.  Do it anyway cause the study said so.  And big pharma cashes in.  Did you know that they gi ve you neulesta a drug to help make blood cells if your numbers fall to low because the chemo kills it?  Did you also know that ONE treatment, and you may need up to 16 treatments in my regiment, is $10,000???  And that does’t even count in the actual chemo treatment.  I don’t even want to see what our total may be after all of this.  Yet this is a woman’s ONLY option and a better choice than anything natural?

After talking with over 100 women online going through the same thing it is UNREAL how many oncologists are not on the same page with natural supplements.  Mine says no problem and tracks what I take.  Others will tell woman absolutely NO supplements not even a multi-vitamin or an extra C, B or Vitamin D. They even have different ideas of what you should eat and drink during this.  GRRRRRRR.

Ok rant over, but you get my drift on all of this right?  I am just pissed off and when I get pissed off I cry.

My week has been very exhausting.  I had to cancel a few things as I just couldn’t get to them.  I did do a vitamin C infusion but it didn’t seem to do much and not sure if it is worth $225 for another.  I feel like I am constantly hung over yet alcohol doesn’t really appeal to me much right now.  I know, SHOCKER!  lol.

My white blood cell was a bit elevated and red blood cell a little low.  Not to much that it altered any treatment though.  We will see what my tests say tomorrow.  No fevers anyway so that is good.  Not bad that I made it over 1/2 way before the numbers began to waiver.  So that is a plus.

Another plus is I had to trim my bangs again today as they were hanging in my eyes to much.  Hopefully it will continue to grow after I start the dose dense red devil crap on aug 16th.

I am hoping to stay awake all day Saturday for Charley’s graduation party.  Last Saturday was a nappy kind of day so wish me luck.  Finally replenished my coffee supply so that should help.  I am also going to try a new oil recipe for pain issues (headache mostly) that a dear friend gave to me last night.  I will let you know how it works.  She is a nurse and said it helps many of her clients at an assisted living facility she works at.  It’s great having so many connections!  🙂

So far I have been able to work 2 days out of the week but this week was really hard.  I am hoping next week will be better.  I will also be getting another ultrasound before I start the dose dense to see if the tumor has shrunk further.  Continued prayers would be much appreciated -even tho I know I don’t have to ask because i know you are all thinking of me when you are not busy lol.

So tomorrow is #11 out of 16.  Can’t wait to have my Thursdays back sometime.  Thanks for helping me stay positive through all this crap.  I appreciate you all.

See ya next week.



Week 9 of 16

Even after 9 weeks of chemo I am still learning about it!

With no hairs in your nose, due to chemo, there is nothing to filter out dirt and allergens and help to get rid of mucus either. So I am very stuffy as well as have more bloody noses and other sinus issues.  Sadly if I don’t take a claritin every single day my head feels like it will explode.

I also learned that I don’t have to take steroids, the main reason to use them each week is for allergic reactions to the chemo and to help battle the nausea.  The nausea has not been to bad so I am going to ask them if I can avoid the steroids and hopefully I won’t have the food cravings and bloating from it.  It has been helpful to speak to other women going through this as I thought this was not an option but they tell me different.

I’ve also asked to have iv fluids each week now after treatment as it really helps with the exhaustion.  So hopefully they will agree with that.

I am worried how the AC treatments will go during August and September as they are  more dose dense and could have more severe side effects.  I’ve been trying to keep an open mind about this but it is hard when I see many others doing treatments who look so unhealthy and you can tell they do not feel well during their treatments.

My doterra team and I have been discussing products to help with all of this and someone asked how many products do you use in any one given day.  I have found that even without the whole cancer issue I use anywhere from 16-25 products or oils each and every day.  I still think this is why I have had such good success with it all.  I feel so  bad for those women who are told by their dr not to take any vitamins or minerals or even omega 3 while they are going through their regiment for cancer.  These women feel so sick and feel just awful for the most part.  I don’t understand why the drs are not all on the same page with this.  My dr says as long as she has a list of what I am using she has had no problem with me taking supplements and using oils.  She only had issue with the Alpha CRS because it does have ingredients that can increase blood flow and I was getting a lot more leg and joint pain and nerve issues when I took it.  Otherwise all the rest have been good.  But then there are other doctors who say “absolutely NOT” for any type of supplement, even vitamin D3.  I just don’t understand it, there are many studies that point to the opposite of this theory.  Yet many women will ONLY do what their dr tells them to do.  For me, I cannot offer that type of blind faith in a dr.  Not when I’ve done my own research on this.  It is MY BODY not the drs.  One woman even said her dr said NO tea and I feel bad for her because without my essiac tea my hot flashes would be out of control and I’d be miserable.

So far with the iv fluids my Monday, Tuesday & Wednesday until treatment on Thursdays are going pretty well.  So I’ll take it!  I am able to see clients on Tuesdays & Wednesdays so far and it is working well.  I hope to continue it until the end of September.  I will be giving the 25% discount on the reflexology and reiki until end of August so I am hoping everyone will take advantage of this while I need to limit my hours.

Kids seem to be handling things well, Adam still has his share of meltdowns and I think it’s because he is unsure of what is all going on and it’s tough for him to understand it.  Stability is best for him but there are just times when things change quickly and there is no time to prepare for them.  So it’s one day at a time.

Here I am in my astronaut outfit again.  lol.  But so far I have not lost any hair.  I am happy.

Have a great day and count your blessings, be grateful for at least one thing today.  I am grateful I can walk wherever I need to go right now. Thank you Lord!