As I sit here writing this I am trying not to cry.
As some of you know I had a post-op appt today with my surgeon.
She removed the tumor – which was larger and what they call triple negative from left breast. This means it does not respond to hormones. After chemo it was still measuring on MRI as 5.2 cm.
She also removed a smaller tumor of 2.5 cm that was hormone positive from the right breast. This tumor grows from estrogen and progesterone but was her2 negative which is protein. It typically does not respond to chemo but the mammogram said it had and was about 1.2 cm. However I have learned that yes mammo can be very misleading.
She also removed one lymph node on each side under the arms. This is the first node that the tumor drained to and if any cancer cells would be found in the lymph it would be found there first.
Since the surgery I was worried that pathology would not find clear margins and they would have to go back in and remove more.
Carcinoma is the word for cancer.
The surgeon came in with a 3 page report from pathology and you will see below why I began to cry.
Here is what it said:
Left Breast lumpectomy: Posterior Margin: Negative for Carcinoma
Left Breast Lumpectomy: No Residual Carcinoma
Left Lymph Node: Negative for Carcinoma
Right breast Superior Margin: Negative for Carcinoma
Right breast Medial Margin: Negative for Carcinoma
Right Breast Medial Margin: Negative for Carcinoma
Right Breast Lumpectomy: Residual invasive ductal carsinoma, grade 1 less than 1 mm
Right Lymph Node: Negative for Carcinoma
So in other words the 5.2 cm blob showing on the mammogram was no longer cancer in the left breast.
The 1.2cm blob on the right was actually less than 1mm of cancer cells. But with clear margins they are positive they removed it all.
Lymph, as they hoped from other scans were NOT involved at all.
Now I move on to reduction surgery Dec. 7th but am doubting if I really need to or not. It is hard to tell with all the swelling and I need to speak to the plastic surgeon tomorrow about this. There are risks to every surgery.
The nerves waking up in my armpits are more painful than the incisions are and I will be posting some pictures of how the incisions are healing with applying the immortelle oil blend.
God has blessed me and given me more time on this earth and I need to figure out what it is that he wants me to do with this gift. I am strongly drawn to the oils as I know they helped me to fight this disease but I will be doing a lot of praying to hopefully be shown what it is I need to focus on with this gift. I thank HIM for a wonderful surgeon who listened to my wishes and preserved as much of ME as she could. I thank HIM for the drs who actually listened to me and did not fight me on using supplements with their treatments. I thank GOD for my husband who never doubted that this report would happen and for being there for me every step of the way and not abandoning me when I needed him the most. I thank GOD for my whole family who have shown me their hearts and have been worried about me and loved me even when I was so unlovable. And I thank GOD for all of YOU! Without you I would not have stayed positive at all. You took the time to think of me, send me energy, pray for me, make food for me, call me and text me asking how I was, sending me funny posts and movie lines to make me laugh. Sending me flowers and beautiful books and priceless gifts. I am so grateful.
I still have radiation that I will have to endure and pray it will go well. So by the time I am done with all of this it will be nearly a year since I was diagnosed. I will also need to be on hormone blockers for years to keep any hormone positive tumors from coming back. This could be a decade or more of daily medications.
My heart is full my friends, and I will be sitting here crying tears of joy and thankfulness tonight. You don’t know how much you mean to me and I hope some day I can return the wonderful things to you.
Try not to worry about the future because you are not in control of it anyway. God is in control even when we question it. Even when we wonder if he really hears us. He does. He loves each and every one of you.